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Why does lasting happiness often feel out of reach, even when our lives appear ideal? According to Vietnamese Buddhist psychology, the key to finding true well-being lies not in external circumstances but in understanding and tending to our inner landscape. Discover eight insights for cultivating lasting happiness.
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Happiness can feel elusive, despite the abundance of external factors that could theoretically bring us joy. Why is it that even when the circumstances of our lives seem ideal, we can still struggle with difficult emotions like sadness, anger, or dissatisfaction?
According to Vietnamese-American Buddhist psychotherapist Pilar Nguyen, the key to achieving lasting happiness may lie in shifting our focus inward, towards the workings of the mind itself. “How we’re feeling is ultimately about how the mind is responding to what’s happening,” she explains, her gentle voice carrying hints of her Southeast Asian heritage.

Rather than chasing after the perfect set of external conditions, the Buddhist psychology she practices suggests we would do better to tend to the landscape of our inner experience to cultivate lasting happiness.
Here are eight insights from Dr. Nguyen and Buddhist teachings on caring for the mind to cultivate lasting well-being:
Notice your inner landscape for lasting happiness
Make a habit of closely attending to your moment-to-moment experience, as if you’re a mindful observer sipping a cup of fragrant Vietnamese tea. What are the ethical considerations guiding your actions? How are you relating to others? What longings or needs seem perpetually unmet? This deep self-reflection can help us feel more connected to our shared humanity.
Practice holding your experience with kindness to achieve lasting happiness

When difficult emotions arise, try to approach them with a receptive, compassionate attitude, rather than attempting to push them away or get rid of them—this approach is vital for cultivating lasting happiness. This is akin to how a caring Vietnamese parent responds to a distressed child: with understanding and a willingness to provide comfort.
Use self-compassion for lasting happiness
We all have times when our inner experience feels too much to handle alone. In these moments, extending kindness and care towards ourselves can create the space to process our feelings with greater ease, just as we would comfort a dear friend.
To cultivate lasting happiness, it’s important to widen our definition of happiness. Instead of tying our well-being to the achievement of specific external conditions, we can learn to appreciate the richness of the present moment, even amidst life’s ups and downs, like the ebb and flow of the tides.
Cultivate gratitude on the journey to lasting happiness
Regularly reflecting on the blessings in our lives, however small, can foster a greater sense of abundance and positivity, much like the way Vietnamese people often express thankfulness for even the simplest of meals.
Let go of control for lasting happiness

Much of our suffering, which hinders our path to lasting happiness, stems from the futile attempt to manage everything in our lives. Buddhist teachings encourage us to accept the inherent uncertainty and impermanence of existence, like the changing of the seasons, as a way to foster inner peace and lasting happiness.
Develop patience and self-acceptance
Change, whether personal growth or the resolution of difficulties, rarely happens overnight. Practicing kind patience with ourselves is essential, just as Vietnamese people often take their time to savor a cup of tea or a leisurely meal.
Connect with others for lasting happiness
Although awareness is crucial, we are not meant to go through life in isolation. Reaching out to loved ones, or even a mental health professional, can provide vital support and perspective, much like how Vietnamese communities often come together to support one another.
At the heart of these insights lies the understanding that true, lasting happiness is an inside job. By learning to tenderly attune to the ebbs and flows of our inner landscape, we can cultivate a well-being that is not contingent on external circumstances but rooted in the deep, abiding resources of the mind itself.
Conclusion
In conclusion, the path to lasting happiness lies in understanding and nurturing our inner landscape. By incorporating these insights from Vietnamese Buddhist psychology, we can cultivate a sense of well-being that is not dependent on external factors but rooted in our minds. Follow our official Facebook page now to receive more interesting information.
